Somewhere between working woman and working mother life changes dramatically. Priorities shift. Responsibilities expand. Time passes with greater speed. Worst of all you begin to lose yourself in the haste of work, family and life until suddenly you wake up to realize that you're always last on your "to do" list. You constantly put your needs aside by saying things like, "if I had more time," or "my job is so demanding," or "one day when my kids are older." Eventually, the thought of caring for yourself sounds blasphemous and impossible so you resign yourself to a life of service to others. You lose yourself to the demands of working motherhood then one day you fall asleep to your life and forget about your dreams, aspirations and needs altogether. When you begin to feel out of balance, restless or discontent about your life, it's usually because something deep inside you is waking up. Your dreams are begging to be heard. Your aspirations are longing to be fulfilled. Your needs are aching to be met. All these are subtle cues to the dissonance you have in your life the gap between what you're doing and what you truly want to be doing. How do you find yourself and resolve this feeling of dissonance? The solution is to address these three key elements of integrated living: Personal Mastery: Mastering the Inner You Personal mastery is the fulfillment of your potential in balance with the development of your mental, emotional, social and physical well being. To achieve this you must develop a foundation of inner and outer strength. Working moms who have achieved a high level of personal mastery coast through tough times with confidence and grace. They have a higher degree of confidence, self love and assuredness that evokes balance and happiness. To achieve personal mastery you can start by asking three simple questions: >> What is my dream? >> What are my principles for living and how am I living them out? >> What are the key roles in my life and how am I honoring them? Talk time to reflect deeply on these questions and then free write for five minutes put pen to paper for continuous writing. Do your best not to limit yourself by your past or your present. Just allow whatever comes from your mind and heart to flow freely on to the paper. When you are consumed by negative thoughts you invite negative results. If, however, you focus your thinking on possibility and optimism, success and achievement are more likely to enter your life. Why is that? Stephen Covey, in this book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, offers a simple answer in this see do get model. In this model he explains that what you see creates what you do, which results in what you get. So if you see yourself stuck in a job that you really hate because you have to pay the bills, it's very likely that you notice all the negative things about work everyday. However, if you choose to see your work as a vessel for leveraging your talents and strengths you will begin to take pride in your work which may result in a promotion or offer to take on work that truly fits you. Learn to transform adversity into opportunities rather than roadblocks. Tell positive life stories, rather than stories of scarcity, fear and inadequacy. When life hands you lemons, then make lemonade and celebrate! Connection: Nurturing Relationships that Count Being a working mom can be an isolating experience. Often, the busyness of life makes it challenging to find time to develop and maintain your personal and professional network. Or you may be the kind of person who believes you can make it on your own. So when you hit a ripple in your life or you want to share a new accomplishment, you may find that you've got no one to turn to who truly matters. If you seek balance in your work/life, then developing a strong community is essential. When you've developed supportive relationships you're much better at responding to stress, plus you have access to information, resources and connections that will help you navigate through the ups and downs of working motherhood. Start today by analyzing your current relationships. Who are the important people in your life right now? What have you done to nurture and develop that relationship? What gaps do you see in your network? Do you need a mentor? Do you need help caring for your children so you can take time for personal renewal? How can you help the people in your network? 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What truly spurred me on was an embarrassing family trip to Disney World and Universal Studios. Due to the size restrictions, I couldn't join my wife and kids on many of the best rides. That was one of the worst consequences I ever faced. I ate foods I liked, but prepared them differently. Before Weight Watchers, I prepared everything as a casserole with lots of butter, cream and starchy fillers. I learned to switch to simply cooked chicken, fish and lean meats. Good things started happening. For the first three months, weight came off steadily, just with everyday movement and a few diet changes. By the six month mark, I was stuck at a plateau and needed to start cardio workouts to continue losing, which I did. You've got to realize, I was the guy whose heart started pounding just from cutting the grass with a power mower. For me, cardio fitness was a medical necessity. I made the treadmill and the StairMaster part of my regimen. Were there any unforeseen obstacles along the way? 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It's those small, simple things that really show me how far I've come. I remember how happy I was when I reached the point where I didn't have to adjust the driver's seat to get out of my car. It was a safety issue. Fighting fires and performing rescues is very physically demanding. If you're not able to perform in those situations, it is very easy to go from rescuer to victim. Thanks to my weight loss, I was able to earn my new position as lieutenant, which was very rewarding. To get to that grade requires training pretty comparable to basic training for the military. The gear we put on weighs 40 to 50 pounds, so it's critical to have as little of your own excess weight as possible. It's a great feeling to know you've put yourself in the right physical shape to be able to save someone's life or save their home. Tim: Losing weight should never be misery. Find foods you love and figure out how to make them healthy. It's the same with exercise. Just try to move more. For example, I started parking 400 yards from the mall entrance to give myself a brisk walk in both directions. This is from a guy who used to exit a mall and drive the length of it to get to a store at the other end! I'd also suggest you put some cool rewards on the horizon, like clothing sizes you want to shop for. I went all the way from a [size] 54 waist to a 36. I even went down a whole shoe size! Tim: There's always an effort and a commitment to maintaining your health and eating right. But I get a lot of help in that regard from my work as a Weight Watchers meetings leader. It's one more chance for me to do what I like, which is helping other people. As a leader, I'm able to talk about the pretty unusual experience of dropping 150 pounds. It lets my group know they have a great shot at reaching their weight goals, too. 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Only then will you be able to make sales to them.3. Having a list of subscribers to your ezine does give you the opportunity to sell to it as well. If you have a list of your own, you can trade solo ads with other publishers. There were plenty of other publishers who will let you mail to their list if you are offering a product that does not directly compete with them. There are many other reasons, but the bottom line is publishing an ezine is a great way to build a mailing list and make money at the same time. Anyone can do this with a little bit of effort. Herbert Davies invites you to visit his home business ideas website to see the Top Picks for 2008. His website is dedicated to researching home business ideas and opportunities that can help you get started today. It includes free work at home opportunities.
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